We like to move it move it….

A word of warning before you proceed: if you do not parent/nanny/otherwise interact on a TMI level with a toddler and have never dealt with the, um, ickier sides of toddlerhood, stop here. Seriously. Do not read any further.

If you DO, however, find yourself acquainted with the ickier parts of toddlerdom, you may need this recipe. It is with that in mind that I even publish such a thing — I couldn’t find something fitting, so I made it up.

So if you’re still reading, consider yourself warned.

This is one of my solutions for The Kiddo Who Needs Fiber But Who Will Not Knowingly Ingest Fruits or Vegetables. I’m building an arsenal of solutions.

I’ve spent the last twenty minutes trying to think of a cuter title for this recipe:

Constipation Cookies

Bulk Biscuits

Move It Muffins

Sadly for all of you, I’m kind of at a loss.

Sadder still: sometimes toddler digestive issues are just not cute. We’ll leave it at that.  Without further ado: one of my secret weapons.

In a mixing bowl:

  • 1 cup whole wheat flour (I use only King Arthur flour)
  • 1/2 cup flax meal
  • 1 Tbsp. baking powder
  • 1/2 tsp instant yeast
  • pinch of salt

Cut in with a pastry blender:

  • about 3 Tbsp of butter till the mix looks like cornmeal.

Add to this:

  • a big squeeze of dark Karo syrup (maybe a couple Tbsp.)
  • enough milk to make it look like biscuit dough.

If your toddler is willing to eat such a thing, raisins would be a great addition to these. Mine is not.

Pat out the dough on a floured surface (I use a floursack) and cut biscuits. Place closely together on a parchment paper lined cookie sheet. To make them even more treat-like, sprinkle lightly with cinnamon sugar. Now bake them at 350* for about 20 minutes or until they’re a nice golden brown.

* I normally bake biscuits at more like 400 or 450 but whole wheat flour is denser and takes longer to cook through, so I like a lower temperature for these; that way the outside doesn’t get too crispy before the inside is done.

I have tried these, and they’re actually kinda tasty! The butter and the sweetness of the Karo make them more likely to actually be consumed by a toddler. With a smear of Nutella on top they’re downright tasty (but so is practically anything with Nutella). With some Sunbutter on them, they’re a meal for The Kiddo in and of themselves! Also (confession alert) I told my kid they’re cookies. So far he’s buying it.

Risotto: not nom-proof

I love a good cooking challenge. And yowza was risotto a challenge at first. I know what you’re thinking: oh, like stirring is so hard? No, in and of itself, it’s not. However stirring for 25 minutes with a two year old in the kitchen? That’s a challenge.

As I say, though, I like a challenge. So, I keep making it. I make it, I eat it (oh the sacrifices!), then I watch this again — Tony Bourdain showing Real Risotto in Venice. I can tell you I’m not anywhere near attempting that flinging-splashing-splat move shown there (unless someone wants to volunteer to come clean my kitchen afterward), but it’s a sight to behold. And it gives me a good image of what my finished risotto should look like.

I’m getting there. And I’m sure enjoying the efforts!

Apple crisp

I had the WORST craving for apple crisp this week. A craving, yes, but no recipe. And no patience to go looking for one. So here’s what I came up with:

I’m the only one in the house who likes an apple crisp (no sharing! Score!), so I cut up two granny smith apples and tossed them in lemon juice so they wouldn’t brown (that’s two fruits already; this is practically a salad). Then I sprinkled in brown sugar (about 1/3 cup) and generous sprinkles of cinnamon and nutmeg, and stirred till the apples were all coated in sugary goodness.

I melted butter in the bottom of a little baking dish and spread it out with a brush, then dumped in the coated apples.

In a new bowl I put about a 1/2 cup each of white flour, white sugar, and oats. I cut in about 3-4 Tbsp of butter and a pinch of salt, and sprinkled that over the apple mixture.

25 minutes in a 350 toaster oven = happy mama. Apple crisp for breakfast anyone?

Apple crisp

I had the WORST craving for apple crisp this week. A craving, yes, but no recipe. And no patience to go looking for one. So here’s what I came up with:

I’m the only one in the house who likes an apple crisp (no sharing! Score!), so I cut up two granny smith apples and tossed them in lemon juice so they wouldn’t brown (that’s two fruits already; this is practically a salad). Then I sprinkled in brown sugar (about 1/3 cup) and generous sprinkles of cinnamon and nutmeg, and stirred till the apples were all coated in sugary goodness.

I melted butter in the bottom of a little baking dish and spread it out with a brush, then dumped in the coated apples.

In a new bowl I put about a 1/2 cup each of white flour, white sugar, and oats. I cut in about 3-4 Tbsp of butter and a pinch of salt, and sprinkled that over the apple mixture.

25 minutes in a 350 toaster oven = happy mama. Apple crisp for breakfast anyone?

Cast Iron Care: not for the germaphobic

These are my cast iron skillets. I adore them.  I won’t make pineapple upside down cake or cornbread in anything else. My great grandmother bought them; she used them, my grandmother used them, my mother used them, and now I use them. They are seriously seasoned. And they survive and look fabulous to this day because I follow, as taught to me by all those women before me, The Rule of Cast Iron: Soap is the enemy. Look, it just IS. You just cannot convince me it’s okay to use soap on a cast iron skillet. It’s not. I once nearly fired a maid service because they used SOAP to clean a skillet. I wanted to cry.

So here’s what I do: after frying up bacon (saving the grease for green beans and cornbread, obviously), sausage, pancakes, whatever, I get to work cleaning the pan. It’s easiest to do this while the pan is still warm, so hop to it. For most situations, I do a quick rinse under HOT running water. If there’s anything really stuck, I use a stiff brush that I keep just for the purpose of cast iron and scrub stuck-on bits off under HOT running water. Then I set the pan back on the warm burner on the stove and leave it on till all the water evaporates (rust is not your friend). When it’s completely dry, put a little oil in the pan — olive oil, shortening, whatever — and briskly rub it around with a paper towel till all surfaces are covered. The end. I keep mine stored in a stack with paper towels in between them to absorb any errant moisture in the air (again, that rust thing).

And that’s it. Seriously. It’s not hard, but there is a method to it. And the method does not, ever, not even once, involve soap.

/lecture

What to do if your cast iron is a little less than kitchen-ready?

Start by removing any possible rust. Pour some salt on the pan (kosher is great) and cut a potato in half. Use the potato like a brush and scrub the salt around to loosen everything up.

Then scrub it under super hot water with a stiff brush (not wire — like a stiff dish scrubbing brush), and set it on a burner on low-medium to dry completely.

Now the stinky part: re-seasoning! Cover the bottom rack of your oven with foil — it’ll make any drips easier to clean up. Now melt about a Tbsp or so of Crisco in the cast iron on the stove top. Use a paper towel to wipe the melted crisco over ALL surfaces of the pan — the handle, the top, the bottom, the edge, etc. Everywhere.

Put it upside down in the oven, and turn the oven on to 350. Bake for at least an hour, then turn the oven off, but leave the pan in there till it’s cool. And voila! I bet you have a pretty spiffy looking pan at the end.